tv The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon NBC April 8, 2016 11:34pm-12:38am EDT
and featuring the legendary roots crew. >> questlove: 451! >> steve: and now, here he is, jimmy fallon! ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: hey, that's a hot crowd! ooh, boy. welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome. thank you very much. welcome to "the tonight show." this is it, baby. [ cheers and applause ] you made it. you made it to the show.
thank you, guys. here's what people are talking about, you guys. yesterday, former new york city mayor rudy giuliani announced that he's voting for donald trump in the upcoming new york primary. [ audience boos ] when asked why, giuliani said because if he wins, he'll have to move to washington. [ laughter and applause ] actually donald trump announced yesterday that he's changing up his campaign staff and adding a a convention manager. which is the most creative way i've heard someone describe the word "bouncer." [ laughter ] "get them out. get them out of here. get them out." meanwhile, ben carson was asked about trump's controversial campaign manager yesterday, who has been charged with assault for pushing a reporter at a a trump rally, and check out how carson tried to defend him. >> well, look, he's been charged with misdemeanor assault. a lot of people think that is a a reason. >> well, i mean, a lot of people have been charged with
various things. that doesn't necessarily mean that we need to demonize them. you've probably been charged with something, too. maybe with a misdemeanor or something. it doesn't mean that you're a a horrible person. and, you know, this is -- >> i actually haven't. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: what? no. no, i didn't -- >> steve: no. >> jimmy: i mean, we've all committed serious crime and changed our names and started a a new life. [ laughter ] at least we can all look forward to fx's new mini series "the people versus ben carson." [ laughter and applause ] donald trump's daughter ivanka just gave birth last week and i saw that she's already back on the campaign trail for her dad. ivanka's friends were like, "shouldn't you be with the baby?" and ivanka was like, "yeah, i'm campaigning for him. [ laughter ] i said -- i meant -- >> steve: no. >> jimmy: check this out, a new interview. bernie sanders said that he went to boy scout camp in new york. you can tell it was a while ago because bernie sanders didn't
learn how to make a fire at boy scout camp, he discovered fire. >> steve: really? >> jimmy: yeah. isn't that amazing? [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: feel the bern. >> jimmy: this is cool. pope francis has invited bernie sanders to the vatican next week. [ cheers ] not for a meeting. just because the pope wants to pull off a "parent trap" switch and see if anyone notices. [ laughter and applause ] oh, this is some big sports news here. i saw that twitter has signed a a deal with the nfl to stream thursday night football games. [ cheers ] and rewatching some older games, you can tell the nfl has been getting ready for twitter for a long time. check this out. >> third down and goal. only a three-man rush. he throws to the end zone. and it's caught. touchdown! #blast #youalldontknowme. [ laughter and applause ] >> jimmy: very natural. "get him out." [ laughter ] some business news, i read that
victoria's secret is cutting 200 jobs. [ audience aws ] when victoria's secret employees heard they were getting a pink slip, they were like, great, i'm a medium. [ laughter and applause ] a man at wal-mart in missouri has been fired for hugging people to thank them for their business. [ audience aws ] after being told he was getting fired, the man said, "oh, i don't work here." [ laughter and applause ] bring it in. come on. aw, that feel good? yeah. i'm a hugger. get this. there's a start-up company called cowlar has created a a fitbit for cows. [ light laughter ] it could actually help farmers know when they're mating. as opposed to the old way farmers knew they were mating, putting their ear up to the barn door and listening for barry white. ♪ [ mooing ] ♪
>> steve: mooving. >> jimmy: oh, it's happening. let's get to some entertainment news here. warner brothers is apparently working on an animated movie based on the looney tunes character speedy gonzalez. in face they already released the first clip and it looks like speedy is facing a new enemy. take a look at this. ♪ [ laughter ] >> amigos. [ speaking spanish ] pussy cat. ♪ >> get away from my beautiful wall. [ applause ] >> jimmy: get him out. get him out. [ laughter ] get him out. guys, i read that the cia actually helped produce an episode of "top chef" called "covert cuisine." the cia. yeah. in fact they even released the recipe for chili. look at this. isn't that cool? [ laughter and applause ] you'll figure it out. you can't give everything away.
and finally last night was the series finale of "american idol" over on fox. i saw that president obama even appeared in a pre-taped message on the show where he said that voting in an election should be as easy as voting on "american idol." actually not a bad idea. check this out. >> and now we find out what you decided. after the nationwide vote, the winner is -- nobody. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: we have a great show. give it up for the roots. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ >> jimmy: this is a great show tonight. everybody's in a great mood. i woke up to a really fun thing today.
because everybody's in new york running for president. everyone's -- sure. trying to get supporters and so i saw this photo here. i guess hillary clinton was using the subway. because she's a new yorker. she's showing -- not taking a a car around. anyway, this picture with, like, 20 cameras around her. right? she's trying to swipe her metro card and it's not working. [ light laughter ] but, anyways this is the best part. can you zoom in there? that's my idea. that's my company. i had this idea. this is a true story. so, i had this idea -- remember? i said, what do you do when you're psyched at a ball game or you're watching your team, when something great happens, you go like this. i go, stop. why is this not being used? this is like prime real estate. this should be the -- this should be the shirt. [ light laughter ] >> steve: yeah, that's where you want it, yeah. exactly. >> jimmy: so i talked -- i asked -- i met with this company. 'cause when your hands are
down, you kind of look like a a normal sweatshirt. but then -- i'm crazy. you know? that's when you go, "yeah, what's up?" they made it. [ cheers and applause ] boing. yeah. so anyway, i just thought it was really cool because i feel like "shark tank." i feel like mark cuban liked my idea or something. i'm like, "wait, that's my --" 'cause we just put these things in the subway and it's crazy. it was so funny, it made me laugh. anyway, they're very available. >> steve: what do you mean by "very"? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: what's that? >> steve: what do you mean very available? >> jimmy: what do you mean? >> steve: how many people ordered them? >> jimmy: any team, any size, we got them. [ laughter ] you got one, right? did you order one? >> steve: i ordered one for you. so there's two. you ordered one. i ordered one. >> jimmy: that's it. >> steve: that's two. every other team. >> jimmy: i got them right here. here they are, absolutely. hands high. [ applause ] i thought that was great. it's quality stuff. check it out, man. guys, check us out again next
week, sir ben kingsley will be here. amy schumer will be here. hugh laurie, and robert de niro will be here. [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: wow! what a week. >> jimmy: plus a performance from ice cube and common together. it's going to be great. [ cheers and applause ] but first, we have a fantastic show. she's the coolest and just gorgeous and awesome. from the hbo movie "confirmation," the lovely kerry washington is here. [ cheers and applause ] kerry and i are going to play a a new game called "famous face off" later in the show. it's a new game, and it's awesome. plus, this guy is so funny. the star of his very own comedy series "dr. ken." ken jeong is stopping by. [ cheers and applause ] ken jeong always brings it. he always brings it. he's just fun, man. he can dance, he can sing. he's just a fun dude. and then one of our all-time favorites. i mean, let me go through some of the songs this man has here. when he was with dion and the belmonts, he had -- ♪ i wonder why
>> jimmy: "teenager in love." ♪ why can't i be a teenager in love ♪ >> jimmy: then he had "runaround sue." [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ >> jimmy: yeah. "the wanderer." ♪ i'm the type of guy that will never settle down i roam from town to town ♪ he did "ruby baby," "donna the prima donna." ♪ donna donna >> jimmy: he's got "abraham, martin and john." anybody -- ♪ my old friend john he's just awesome. i love this dude. dion is in the house tonight. >> steve: come on. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: performing his single "ride with you." rock 'n' roll hall of famer dion is here tonight. that is royalty.
rock 'n' roll royalty, man. oh, i love him. guys, friday that's usually when i catch up with some personal stuff. [ cheers ] thank you. everyone knows this. i check my inbox, i return some e-mails. and i send out thank you notes. and so -- [ cheers and applause ] can i write them out right now, is that cool? thank you very much. we write out some thank you notes, higgins, if you don't mind. >> steve: oh, that's all right. go ahead. >> jimmy: i just figured. yeah i know i'm on tv and everything. but, i'm very busy. >> steve: seems like a waste of time. but go ahead. no, we could -- >> jimmy: i mean, you're fine with it? you're cool? i would normally do this off camera. >> steve: right, off camera, that seems like what somebody would do. but -- >> jimmy: yeah, but i'm running behind today. >> steve: don't worry about it. >> jimmy: i had all this exciting hands high news. [ light laughter ] and so i was just running behind. so you're cool? >> steve: all right. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: james? can i get some "thank you note" writing music, please? ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: he seems sketchy. sketchy. >> jimmy: ooh, sketchy, real sketchy. >> steve: yeah. >> jimmy: good gosh. >> steve: a little bit shady. >> jimmy: yeah. >> steve: a little shady.
>> jimmy: is he growing a a goatee or something? >> steve: is he? let me see. [ light laughter ] oh, my gosh, i think he is. >> jimmy: in the middle of growing one. in the middle of growing a a goatee. >> steve: that's called pre-tee. >> jimmy: yeah, it's a pre -- [ laughter ] >> steve: it's going to go-tee pretty soon. >> jimmy: baby goat. baby goat. bahh. >> steve: not so baaaaad. >> jimmy: we kid. thank you, james. ♪ thank you, the green jacket at the pga masters, for showing us what would happen if ralph lauren hooked up with a a pool table. [ laughter and applause ] congratulations. >> steve: take it off. >> jimmy: here's this. ♪ thank you, companies that open nap rooms, for being a great way to identify which employees you should fire first when the layoffs come. [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: that guy, that guy. >> jimmy: gary takes a nap every day. >> steve: every day for five hours. >> jimmy: what? what happened? you're fired. >> steve: why?
you've been sleeping for the last four years. >> jimmy: why? >> steve: wait a second. where am i? what? am i at home? [ snoring ] [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: it's more your voice that's annoying us, gary. >> steve: what do you mean? >> jimmy: i mean, no one really talks like you. >> steve: uhh, why would you say that? [ laughter ] iiii just want to take a nap. >> jimmy: just a little wacky, gary. ♪ thank you, the new "sesame street" character from afghanistan called zari. whenever people asked me who my favorite "sesame street" character is, i always said elmo. but -- ♪ is it too late now to say zari ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> steve: bieber. >> jimmy: my man. ♪ thank you, the wave at sporting
events, for showing me that thousands of drunk people can be on the same page about something. [ cheers and applause ] >> steve: wave it out. >> jimmy: perfect. come on. reinventing the wave. [ cheers and applause ] reinventing the wave. ♪ the shirt i'm wearing can't you tell that ♪ ♪ i'm the type of guy that will never settle down i run from town to town ♪ >> steve: i was just sleeping. [ light laughter ] >> jimmy: are you one of the seven dwarfs? >> steve: what? [ light laughter ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, restaurants that put sprigs of mint in iced tea, for saying, "hey, here's something for you to remove." [ applause ] >> steve: can you throw this away for me? >> jimmy: sure, i can do that, i guess. >> steve: thank you. i left some paper on the straw, too. >> jimmy: i put a cigarette
butt in there, too, i hope you enjoy it. [ light laughter ] it's my last day. >> steve: oh, that was your tea? i'm getting fired. for taking naps in the nap room. ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, microwave ovens, for letting me cook food in minutes without ever knowing what half your buttons do. [ applause ] >> steve: power defrost? >> jimmy: defrost turkey? >> steve: i can't even figure out how to turn it on. >> jimmy: i got some triv -- quick triv for you. >> steve: what's that? >> jimmy: are you ready for this? see if you know the answer to this. >> steve: all right, ready? wait. >> jimmy: you know those -- >> steve: go. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no, stop. sorry, you're thinking too hard. >> steve: oh. >> jimmy: you know the popcorn sensors on the microwave? you press the button, why does it go off? what's the science behind it? how do they know when the popcorn is done? >> steve: when the sound is done. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: no! that was my guest, too. anyone out there know? >> humidity. >> jimmy: that's correct, sir. humidity. >> steve: humidity. >> jimmy: when the steam comes out of the bag, that's when the microwave turns off. >> steve: oh, snap.
>> jimmy: the more you know. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] i don't know what i'm doing anymore. >> steve: mine's the size of a a refrigerator. ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, throw blanket, for being surprisingly really hard to throw. [ applause ] >> steve: hey, give me that. i want to take a nap. >> jimmy: i was taking a nap and he took my blanket. >> steve: give me my blanket back. >> jimmy: here's more mint sprigs in your iced tea. [ light laughter ] humidity. >> steve: humidity. who knew? >> jimmy: the more you know, dude. >> steve: hey, it's science, right? [ light laughter ] ♪ >> jimmy: thank you, pints of ice cream, for starting out as
a nice treat and ending as a a sad realization that you have no self-control. there you guys have it. those are my "thank you notes." we'll be right back with kerry washington, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ with the new money monopoly game at mcdonald's, you've got a 1 in 4 chance of winning from over 100 million food and cash prizes. it's hard to find better odds. the odds of winning from items like this big mac? sfx: ding! the odds of scoring a hole-in-one? sfx: clank! the odds of winning from items like these chicken mcnuggets? sfx: ding! the odds of your taxes being audited? sfx: clank! the odds of your auditor winning from delicious items like these. sfx: ding! there's a 1 in 4 chance of winning with all these items. so hurry in to mcdonald's and play today! ♪ let's go. what? you didn't even move your hands! another game! i've got a table ready at 6:00 o'clock. alexa, how's the traffic?
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in the last eight years, the fracking industry has spent over $40 million dollars on lobbying in pennsylvania. so it's no surprise that even though they've had over 4,000 violations, all they've ever gotten is just a slap on the wrist it's time for that change. i'm josh shapiro, and i'll hold the oil and gas companies criminally liable for poisoning our air and our drinking water. i'll be an attorney general who always works for you. democrat josh shapiro. he'll stand up for us. whewhat does it look like?ss, is it becoming a better professor by being a more adventurous student? is it one day giving your daughter the opportunity she deserves? is it finally witnessing all the artistic wonders of the natural world?
whatever your definition of success is, helping you pursue it, is ours. t-i-a-a. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: our first guest stars on the hit show "scandal" and starting april 16th, you can also see her as anita hill in the hbo film "confirmation." ladies and gentlemen, please welcome kerry washington! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: how are you? who's got the moves? you got the moves.
you have the moves. >> they inspire. they inspire. >> jimmy: they inspire. >> they inspire. >> jimmy: you inspire. >> thanks. >> jimmy: you come out dancing all the time. >> oh, thanks. >> jimmy: you are actually a a great dancer. you should do more dancing. >> that's very sweet of you to say. i've been taking dance for a a long time. >> jimmy: you have. >> since i was a little girl. >> jimmy: yeah, we talked about this. >> i used to go, initially, just for the candy that they gave out at the end of class. [ laughter ] but then i continued to dance. i had this very inspiring teacher named larry maldonado. for anybody that's from my neighborhood in the bronx, he was our role model and he had an awesome substitute teacher named jennifer who would sometimes step in and teach. but then she left and moved to l.a. and be on "in living color." >> jimmy: jennifer -- the jenny from the block? >> i learned to dance from j. lo. >> jimmy: what? [ cheers ] >> so that explains everything. >> jimmy: so, that's cool. >> that's why i'm a really good dancer. >> jimmy: so that happened. >> it was like meant to be that i would be famous. >> jimmy: i mean, she was there the whole time. >> come on. >> jimmy: so that's cool.
>> yeah. >> jimmy: what else is cool? i guess that. for real? >> i mean, there are so many cool things about me. but that's the best. >> jimmy: jennifer lopez. jennifer lopez in the bronx. >> 'cause we're from the block. >> jimmy: yes. [ laughter ] >> yeah. >> jimmy: you saw the block where jenny is from the block. >> don't be fooled by the rocks that i got. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: well, you're not -- >> i'm kerry from the block. >> jimmy: you're kerry from the block. hey, how fun is that, though? >> yeah. >> jimmy: that you get to do that? oh, my gosh. you dance now? >> at home all the time. >> jimmy: yeah. yeah. >> jimmy: yeah. >> we do dance parties in my house. >> jimmy: yeah. right now, "work," rihanna's "work." >> jimmy: oh, yeah. [ cheers ] >> very popular in my house. >> jimmy: that's great, that's a fun song. >> yeah. >> jimmy: and you don't really need to know all the words too. [ laughter ] >> you can't know all the words. >> jimmy: i think she makes them up towards the end. ♪ blur blur blur blur blur blur blur blur give me that nur nur nur nur nur nur ♪ >> yeah, yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: it's fantastic. >> yeah. >> jimmy: i dig it, though. >> yeah. >> jimmy: i gotta say congrats. "scandal" just picked up for its sixth season. >> that's crazy. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: amazing. they love it.
we love it. >> thank you. >> jimmy: good episode. good episode. >> no spoilers. >> jimmy: no, no, no, i don't do that. >> 'cause it's friday. >> jimmy: i don't spoil anything. >> so maybe people haven't watched their dvrs. >> jimmy: no. >> but some could say i really figured out how to chair a a meeting. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: that is a -- yeah. yeah. that's like a nonspoiler. that's the worst spoiler any one -- [ laughter ] 'cause you only can understand that if you saw it. >> if you saw it. >> jimmy: yeah. >> it's an inside scoop for the real gladiators. inside joke. >> jimmy: the gladiators, i love those guys. but i was asking, like, how do you do all those intense scenes and what is it like doing those, you know, it's a very dramatic scenes on there. >> yeah. to be totally serious, i mean it's very challenging sometimes, but i have like a a secret weapon kind of coach who stands off to the side a a lot of the times in scenes. and i brought a picture actually because i feel like it could help some actors understand the process. >> jimmy: they can maybe see if they can hire them. >> yeah. >> jimmy: it's these tiny dog there. [ laughter ] who is that? >> that's josie. >> jimmy: that's josie. >> her full name is
josephine baker. [ audience aws ] and she helps me. like if i forget my lines. >> jimmy: she's just staring at your co-star there. >> she whispers them in my ear. yeah. >> jimmy: what kind of dog is that? >> she doesn't trust him. that's a new actor on the show. she's like, "i don't know about this guy." >> jimmy: yeah. >> "bring back tony goldwyn." no, we love you danny pino. >> jimmy: what kind of dog is it? >> she's a shorkey, half shih tzu, half yorkie. >> jimmy: a shorkey? >> a shorkey. >> jimmy: that's not real. >> as opposed to a [ bleep ]. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: can we say that? if it's a dog, we can say it. >> it's a dog. >> jimmy: yeah. it's a dog. >> it's a name of a dog. >> jimmy: it's a name of dog. yeah. >> you can bleep it. >> jimmy: no, it's the real name of a dog. [ laughter ] let's talk "confirmation." >> yeah. >> jimmy: you play anita hill. >> i do. >> jimmy: it's on hbo. you're very proud of this one. this is a good one. >> also i was a producer on this so it was kind of my baby from the beginning. and i was able to partner with other people who were passionate about the project. and it's really fulfilling to be part of something from its inception all the way through. >> jimmy: yeah. and hbo just knows how to do it too. >> they're the best. >> jimmy: they don't mess around.
>> yeah. >> jimmy: and so i want to show everyone a clip here just so you can see. you probably know the story of anita hill. but here's the clip. here's kerry washington as anita hill in "confirmation." take a look at this. >> why in god's name would you ever speak to a man like that the rest of your life? >> very good question. and i am sure that i cannot answer it to your satisfaction. that is one of the things that i have tried to do here today. i have suggested that i was afraid of retaliation, i was afraid of damage to my professional life. i believe that you have to understand that this kind of response is not atypical. and i can't explain it. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: yeah. premieres april 16th at
8:00 p.m. on hbo. >> thank you. >> jimmy: great job, as always. >> thank you. >> jimmy: you know we're fans of yours. >> mutual. >> jimmy: i thought it would be fun if we could play a game on the show. a brand-new game and you're the perfect person to play this. >> amazing, i'm thrilled. i'm very excited. >> jimmy: yeah. you down? you want to be teammates? >> yes! >> jimmy: let's be teammates. [ cheers and applause ] kerry washington and i are playing "famous face-off" when we get back. it's fun. come watch. it's good. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ you can put a period on what you do, that's fine. that's socially acceptable.
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: welcome back, everybody. i'm hanging out with the great kerry washington! [ cheers and applause ] her new hbo movie "confirmation" premieres april 16th at 8:00 p.m., hbo. kerry and i are about team up for a new game called "famous face-off." but first, higgins is going to need a partner and we found a a good one. he stars in "dr. ken" which airs fridays at 8:30 p.m. on abc, please welcome ken jeong!
♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: group hug. >> group hug. >> jimmy: group hug. we're huggers. >> group hug. >> jimmy: guys, here's how the game works. okay? on your turn you hold up one of the celebrity face masks in front of your face like this and everyone except you knows whose face you're holding up. okay? now your partner has to give you clues to get you to guess who you are as quickly as possible. when you guess who you are, you throw your mask away and the player on your right goes next. it's almost like catchphrase where you pass the buzzer. if you are holding a mask when the buzzer goes off, your team loses that round. we'll play the best of three rounds. let's take our positions. your names are on the card. are you ken? no, you're higgins. >> steve: i'm higgins. >> jimmy: perfect. okay. here we go. >> okay. >> jimmy: are you nervous? >> yes. >> jimmy: no, i was asking him. >> no! yes! i'm next. i'm so nervous. >> jimmy: i was asking him. no!
>> yeah. >> jimmy: that's -- be no, there we go. >> okay. all right. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: all right. we're gonna do fine. we're gonna do fine. okay, ken, you are going to start us off. okay? >> we don't help him, right? >> jimmy: no. we don't help him, we don't enjoy him. we don't like him right now. >> ken. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: let's focus up. this is me and you here. >> steve: team work. >> jimmy: this is me and you here. this is me and you here. okay, ready? on your mark, get set, go. [ beeping ] >> steve: oh, my gosh. you should run for president with jimmy. i loved you in nsync. >> justin timberlake. >> steve: yes. >> throw it. >> jimmy: all right throw it away. all right, go. you go. >> oh. >> jimmy: oh, pretty woman. >> julia roberts. >> jimmy: there you go. throw it. >> hogwarts. [ laughter ] >> steve: daniel ratcliffe. >> yes, yes, yes, yes. >> oh, he's really funny. does movies with chris rock. he does it with drew barrymore. >> jimmy: adam sandler. >> yes. [ cheers ] >> steve: oh. [ laughter ] oh, my gosh, you're running against bernie sanders. >> oh, hillary clinton. >> yes. [ laughter ] >> pee-wee herman. >> yes! [ cheers and applause ] >> oh, angelina adopted a a little boy who looks like me. [ laughter ] and i -- adopted a little boy
who looks just like me. "world war z." >> steve: oh, brad pitt. >> there we go. >> oh! [ buzzer ] aw! >> jimmy: all right, so now, okay, now we lost one. >> okay, now what happens? >> jimmy: now we lost. okay, now we lost. we'll start with me now. >> this sucks. >> jimmy: no, we're going to win now. here we go. >> okay, yeah. okay. >> jimmy: we got to go. >> yeah. i'm ready. >> jimmy: ready? let's do this. >> okay. >> jimmy: ready? >> go. >> jimmy: here we go. start the clock. [ beeping ] >> oh, "pirates of the caribbean." >> jimmy: johnny depp. >> thank you. >> steve: oh, my gosh, you have so many shows on tv. you've got "family feud." you've got the new one -- >> steve harvey! [ laughter and applause ] >> steve: boom. >> where are the eyes? ♪ we can't stop and we won't ♪ >> jimmy: "wrecking ball." i'm on a ball. >> oh, miley cyrus! >> jimmy: yes, yes, yes. >> brad and i adopted a little baby who looks just like me. [ laughter ] >> steve: angelina jolie. >> yes. >> oh, i'm a cat and i'm orange. >> jimmy: garfield! >> thank you. [ beeping ] >> steve: oh, my gosh.
you are the greatest lady in the world. you're 75 years -- you're very old. [ laughter ] you're lovely, though. you were fantastic on "the mary tyler moore show." >> betty white. betty white. >> steve: yes. >> jimmy: okay. i'm hosting the oscars. [ buzzer ] >> chris rock, chris rock, chris rock! chris rock! chris rock! >> jimmy: sorry! >> chris rock! >> jimmy: the winners are steve higgins and ken jeong. i'm sorry. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] i'm sorry. i was bad. my thanks to kerry washington and ken jeong. more with "tonight show" after the break everybody. stick around. i'm sorry. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ data differently. while the other guys gouge you for every bit of data you use... ...now, t-mobile lets you stream all the video and music that you want from your favorite services... free! without using one bit of your lte data. plus, you can roll your unused data forward. nobody does data like t-mobile.
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♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: oh, you did the ken jeong slide on down. oh. the greatest. always making a great entrance. thank you so much, ken jeong, come on, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] >> thank you for having me. thank you guys. thank you. >> jimmy: i love you, they love it. we all love you. i don't know if they love you this much, though because i will show you something soon. this is something that's onon instagram. >> okay? >> jimmy: people are getting tattoos of your face. >> oh, really? [ laughter ] >> jimmy: on their arms. yeah, here's you as mr. chow. look at this. >> oh, yeah. >> jimmy: this is real. [ laughter ] this is it. >> yep. >> jimmy: is that a little bit disturbing maybe? >> yeah, it's a little bit. you're kind of -- you don't know how to respond to that. it's just like, "thank you?"
i really don't -- [ laughter ] you know, i guess it's good for my wife because i really don't have -- the groupies i have are just dudes from australia or whatever just padding their delts. i'm not getting any like nude chick pics or anything like that. >> jimmy: no. >> just more like, yeah, there's another one. very nice. [ laughter ] another delt. >> jimmy: then finally and then this one. >> no, this is just more of my real personality. my inner chi. you know, it's really me. and that's just my outer personality. >> jimmy: yeah. >> extroverted. it's a happier ken. >> jimmy: it's a -- >> it's the "hangover" trilogy. one, two, and three. there you go. [ laughter ] ha ha ha ha ha. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: i want to -- >> ha ha ha. ha ha ha. >> jimmy: stop. [ cheers and applause ] >> i'm sorry. >> jimmy: stop doing that! >> i was rolling dice. >> jimmy: no. oh. >> i was rolling dice. >> jimmy: rolling dice. >> from my groin. >> jimmy: from his groin. throwing them. >> yeah. >> jimmy: that's what he was doing, guys. >> yeah, yeah, yeah. that's sounds good. it helps. >> yeah, yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: congrats, "dr. ken," wrapping it up, season finale,
this is coming up soon. let me get the exact date. april 22nd. it's really, really funny. but it's based on, if you don't know this, you were a real life doctor. >> yeah, real life medical doctor. i worked as a physician for seven years at an hmo but i was also doing stand- up comedy at the same time. and so in the season finale of "dr. ken" my character ken tries stand-up for the first time at the laugh factory which is where i did stand-up comedy. >> jimmy: oh i did stand-up there. >> at the laugh factory, yeah. >> jimmy: i love it. on sunset. >> on sunset and laurel. yeah. >> jimmy: yeah. >> so it's all based on a true story. and it really was just, it was very -- all the dialogue that was in the show was really conversations i had with my wife, like supporting me to do comedy and acting fulltime. so this whole year has been so creatively fulfilling. it's been the most fulfilling year of my -- of my career. i've just been so grateful. and it's because of the fans. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: that's all for the hard work. you're putting the work in. but when you -- was this an open mic? is that what got you up stage? >> yeah. it was open mike at the laugh factory, then jamie masada the owner like managed me. >> jimmy: sure. oh, is that right? >> yeah, it was crazy. >> jimmy: unbelievable. >> it was believable. >> jimmy: but did you, so you never did comedy when you were
a kid? >> well i did some stand-up as a kid, like in north carolina i would do, like, some bars, some open mics around town. but it was like, that kind of was the catalyst. and that led me to getting on comedy central and ultimately getting an agent and getting on "the hangover." it's all -- it's this whole weird journey that i'm not even supposed to be here. so -- [ cheers and applause ] i'm so grateful. >> jimmy: no. but i always like to know, like when did you realize that you had a talent? or did you, you know? >> yeah, when i was at duke, i went to college at duke and i took an acting class for the first time. but before that when i was in high school, i did this mock male beauty pageant called -- it's true story, it's called mr. buccaneer. [ laughter ] and i was a nerd, but i was a a well-liked nerd. so they chose me to be one of the contestants. and i was kind of a pudgier kid growing up in high school. we had like, we did a swimsuit competition like any beauty pageant. had like a speedo. and this is a true story. i'm not -- i wish i was making this up. and it was like -- i'm literally like, it's like hans and franz. i was like -- [ laughter ] >> jimmy: mr. buccaneer? >> mr. buccaneer like that. and it was like people -- it was the first time i ever
performed and people were laughing and it was like -- it was like a great moment. and then for the talent portion i did -- i actually sang a song i never sang in public before. and it was, no joke, it was the commodores, lionel richie, "three times a lady." [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: really? >> yeah, really. no, i'm not even making it up. i sang that for real. >> jimmy: why would you choose that song? >> because i loved it. [ laughter ] >> jimmy: yeah. that's a great song. >> it's a great song. it was dedicated to my prom date, katherine. all right. >> jimmy: okay. sorry. sorry. >> yeah, yeah. >> jimmy: of course, so katherine, if you're watching. yeah. >> katherine, if you're watching. >> jimmy: that was sung like three times. [ laughter ] >> no. >> jimmy: i don't know what that means. no, no. hang on. [ laughter ] rolling dice. >> rolling dice. >> jimmy: he's rolling dice. >> rolling dice. >> jimmy: he's throwing dice. gambling. >> rolling dice. >> jimmy: gambling, we'll have to go to a casino or something. [ laughter ] okay, no. sorry. sorry. >> jimmy: i could just imagine that song. it's just romantic. >> yeah, i know. >> jimmy: it was probably really romantic. >> yeah, my brand. >> jimmy: no. but did it work, though, when you sang? >> it was funny, i actually got a standing ovation and like girls were crying. it was crazy because it was
not -- i wasn't doing it funny. i was doing it sincere. and it wasn't -- >> jimmy: could you give us a a taste? >> no, okay. i don't know. [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: come on. there's a mic. >> i don't -- >> jimmy: what note would you sing it in? >> no. >> jimmy: give us a note. >> i can't. >> jimmy: give us a note. >> i can't. all right. all right. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ you're once twice three times a lady ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ♪ and i love you ♪ yes you're once twice three times a lady ♪ ♪ and i love you [ cheers and applause ]
♪ i love you [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: check out "dr. ken" friday nights at 8:30 on abc! we'll be back with music from dion! stick around! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ proud of you, son. ge! a manufacturer. well that's why i dug this out for you. it's your grandpappy's hammer and he would have wanted you to have it. it meant a lot to him... yes, ge makes powerful machines. but i'll be writing the code that will allow those machines to share information with each other. i'll be changing the way the world works. (interrupting) you can't pick it up, can you? go ahead.
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all they've ever gotten is just a slap on the wrist it's time for that change. i'm josh shapiro, and i'll hold the oil and gas companies criminally liable for poisoning our air and our drinking water. i'll be an attorney general who always works for you. democrat josh shapiro. he'll stand up for us. [ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> jimmy: our musical guest tonight is -- oh, what a treat. he's a rock 'n' roll hall of famer who is out with his 30th solo album, "new york is my home." performing "ride with you" please welcome dion! [ cheers and applause ] ♪ ♪ here i am girl standing in the rain going round inside a hurricane baby ♪
♪ i want to ride with you don't you know how a good man feels ♪ ♪ my mind feels like it ain't got no driving wheel baby i want to ride with you ♪ ♪ whoa oh oh oh oh oh-oh oh whoa oh oh oh oh oh-oh oh whoa ah whoa oh whoa oh ♪ ♪ ♪ whoa oh oh oh oh oh-oh oh whoa oh oh oh oh oh-oh oh whoa ah whoa oh whoa oh ♪ ♪ ♪ sometimes i feel there's no way out of here i look all around i look everywhere ♪ ♪ baby i want to ride with you ♪ ♪ i heard my friend willie green play the blues last night ♪ ♪ he said they'll come and
try and steal your soul all right all right all right all right all right now ♪ ♪ everybody's got to make a change sometime my heart has turned towards the sunshine ♪ ♪ baby i want to ride with you ♪ >> listen to me. ♪ if you wanna go fast go alone ♪ ♪ if you wanna go far let's go together baby i want to ride with you ♪ ♪ whoa oh oh oh oh oh-oh oh whoa oh oh oh oh oh-oh oh whoa ah whoa oh whoa oh ♪ ♪ ♪ whoa oh oh oh oh oh-oh oh whoa oh oh oh oh oh-oh oh whoa ah whoa oh whoa oh ♪ >> let's ride baby. come on, take a trip. ♪ ♪
♪ ♪ ♪ if you wanna go fast go alone if you wanna go far go together ♪ ♪ baby let's ride with you everybody's got to make a change sometime ♪ ♪ my heart has turned towards the sunshine baby i want to ride with you ♪ ♪ i want to ride with you you know i want to ride with you baby ♪ >> come on, you can help me out
here. ♪ whoa oh oh oh oh oh-oh oh whoa oh oh oh oh oh-oh oh whoa ah whoa oh whoa oh ♪ ♪ ♪ whoa oh oh oh oh oh-oh oh whoa oh oh oh oh oh-oh oh whoa oh whoa oh ♪ ♪ i want to ride ride ride ride ride ride oh baby oh baby ride with you ♪ ♪ ride you girl ride you girl ride you girl ♪ ♪ oh baby oh baby i want to ride with you ♪ ♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: come on! that's how you do it. that's how you do it right there. come on. honored. dion! [ cheers and applause ]
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♪ [ cheers and applause ] >> jimmy: my thanks to kerry washington, ken jeong. dion once again! [ cheers and applause ] that's right. and the roots right there, from philadelphia, pennsylvania. [ cheers and applause ] stay tuned for "late night with seth meyers." thank you for watching. have a great weekend. i hope to see you next week. thank you very much. [ cheers and applause ] ♪
[ cheers and applause ] ♪ >> announcer: from 30 rockefeller plaza in new york, it's "late night with seth meyers." tonight -- tracy morgan. from "billions," actress maggie siff. journalists john heilemann and mark halperin. featuring the 8g band with stanton moore. ♪ [ cheers and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, seth meyers! >> seth: good evening. i'm seth meyers, this is "late night." how's everybody doin' tonight? [ cheers and applause ] >> seth: that's fantastic. let's get to the news. a crowd at a recent bernie sanders campaign event erupted in cheers when a bird landed on sanders' podium mid speech. the bird stayed for a couple of minutes and then returned to i